And BINGO was its name-o

For my mom’s birthday my friend Shannon and I took her to Muckleshoot Bingo where 50 games of the most intense BINGO I’ve ever played followed. Now I do not jest when I say the games where intense, we took to drawing the shapes on our cards so that we knew what we were allowed to stamp. My mantra for the night was simply “this is not relaxing.”

In fact, BINGO is not how I remember it. It used to be that you’d get a line in a row and it was time to yell B-I-N-G-O but that is not the case anymore. You need a stamp of four and a BINGO line. You have your block of 6’s. You have two blocks of six. You have a block of eight and you can’t use the free space. There’s a titter tatter. An M for Muckleshoot. A number 1. The list goes on, because you see, this was a special night at the ‘Shoot. A $50 buy-in gets you 50 games with prizes of $500 a hand, a car and the grand prize of $5,000.

After each game the announcer would say a thank you to the past game’s shape, for example … “Thank you large kite.” Thank you regular BINGO.” Thank you Blackout.” Etc. My mom finally looks over at me and asks if they are thanking people for tipping them and I’m thinking , “no,” until the lady next to us tells my mom yes, it’s for tips. The note worthy part of this is that stupid me thought the announcers were doing some sort of a spiritual Indian thing by thanking the shapes of the game as a way to pay homage to the gambling spirit. I mean really, how was I suppose to know it was for tips, I barely knew what shape I was going for half the time.

As a joke we took troll dolls with us “for luck,” mine was dressed in a dragon costume that I named Growl. Mom had the birthday one and Shan had a military guy who was holding an AK47. A lady at the table across from us got really excited when she saw we had troll dolls and brought hers over to show us them. Shannon refused to make eye contact with me during this interaction.

Oh and BINGO has evolved, even further than complicated shapes patterns, BINGO has gone high-tech. For mere $150 you can also rent an electric device that will track the numbers for you and then you have more ways to win. Well these electronic devices malfunction towards the end of the evening and although we were told to do an X the machine Bingo'd someone with a large kite so the announcer had to take the win. W ell this caused a friggin riot. People started yelling at the announcer, someone screamed, “Let’s tell Jessie (you know for KING 5’s Get Jessie?)” An older lady by us screamed, “Fuck the machines,” repeatedly.

Thank you large kite. Thank you black out. Thank you BINGO.

CW

No more pretend in little plastic cups

The Tea Party movement has taken the innocents out of an actual tea party. Thanks fuckers.

CW

A Really Great Book ...

For my birthday a friend bought me the book “Fangland” because I like vampire stuff. Little did I know at the time that this book would turn into one of the best books I’ve read in the genre.

The whole story is a metaphor for how the darkness in humans, when allowed to be unleashed, can infect everyone around us.

A MUST read.

CW

La Fete

For Valentine’s Day (the worst fake holiday ever. No I'm not a bitter single I even hate this day when in a relationship) my friend and I hit up Century Ballroom to check out the Cabaret show there. Lots of awesome dancers – man I wish I could dance that well – and an awesome 6 foot 4 drag queen with a handle bar mustache dancing to all the single ladies. He’s my new favorite person!

CW

Christmas Cards

This year I've gotten some really lovely Holiday cards from friends. One's that sparkle, one’s that are homemade, one’s that are pure works of art, and one’s that took a delicate hand to create. They were all just lovely, heart warming cards from the people I adore.

You know what I sent out this year? I send out cards that talk about how Santa likes to know where all the naughty girls live. Yep, my friends send out these beautiful thoughtful cards and I send out ones about sluts.

Merry friggin’ HO.

CW

2010 … oh my

I don’t usually make New Years Resolutions because they never seem to stick and I’m not really a joiner, so while everyone makes them I’ll just happily wish in the new year while working a concert and hanging with my coworkers.

What I will tell you is that 2010 is already shaping up to be a crazy year for yours truly. I’m the new Marketing Chair for a children’s event that raises money for a local children’s hospital. I’m hoping to teach at least two classes in the spring on interview skills and resume writing. I have to find a new gym so that I can continue my 3x a week swimming routine that I’d like to maintain and so much more which is already in the works. So although I’m not hoping to get thin or start that diet that I’ve been meaning to start I have mapped out some of my year.

But never fear I do make resolutions I just like to make them on my birthday because that’s truly the start of a NEW year for me.

CW

The Prisoner

The great thing about On-Demand is that when everything is on their typical re-run schedule you can watch shows that you didn’t get to see the first time around. Hence, The Prisoner which was an AMC 6 part mini-series. The premise was solid but I gotta say I felt like I wasn’t quite smart enough (and I’m not a dummy by any means) to truly get its meaning. It took the whole “Big Brother” concept up a giant notch.

Yep, other than watching TV I've not been up to a hell of a lot. Sad when that’s the blog topic, isn't it.

CW

“North Face is NOT a Make-up Store” and everyone knows that!! Well Everyone but Me

Recently I was in Portland exploring with my two favorite people. As we investigated Portland and browsed the awesomeness which is the stacks of Powell’s Book Store (my dream place) one of them said they wanted to also hit up North Face. And then my big, smarty pants mouth got me in trouble as I just started bitching about how I’d rather die than go to a make-up store. Yep. I thought North Face was a make-up shop. I’ve repeated this story to a few people and they always seem to be amazed that I had no idea what North Face was. “Have you heard of REI?” one of the many smartasses friends asked. “Yes.” I simply state.

But here’s the thing. I could give a shit about a store called North Face. I have one item made out of fleece in my closet and it’s not even mine – it’s my dads. I own no snow gear, no hiking gear and no climbing gear. The camping gear I have is taken and never returned from my brother... News Alert… I’m not an outdoors kind of girl. Yes I live in the Northwest. But I’m not from here. I like concrete and high-rise buildings; book stores and coffee houses; the sounds of traffic over the sounds of birds chirping in trees. Get it. I’m not nature girl.

I honestly don’t see the big deal about me not knowing what North Face was. Oh and in case you haven’t guessed it already… I don’t like make-up stores either.

CW

In Memory

In Memory
Originally uploaded by Paul's Sister

I think, especially during this time of war, that we sometimes forget that everyday there are men and women who leave their homes and put their lives on the line in order to keep the rest of us safe. As four of them are honored today for their ultimate sacrifice let’s all remember to think of them and their families who will never again be the same.

To donate to the families of the fallen officers visit: www.lpig.us

CW

Just Watch it...

http://www.watchtheguild.com/

CW

What will I put my syrup on now?

It's all over the news sites. Eggo shortage!!! Oh My GOD... what will we all do without it's fattening goodness?

I'll bet anyone a $10 Starbucks gift card that some butthead buys a ton and puts them on eBay.

CW

It sure is taking a long time to get to floor six

Coming home from the gym tonight waiting for the elevator. The doors open and a couple is inside. I ask if they're getting out. They are not. I guess this couple is just riding the elevator in my building. Up and down, up and down. They are drunk. They have a small bag of beers at their feet. The guy has the lady pinned up against the wall. They are making out.

It was the most uncomfortable elevator ride of my life. I would have walked up the six flights but I just got done swimming laps.

CW

The Office - thanks God I don't work there - or do I?

It’s only been on the air for, like what, 5 years and I just now discovered it. And OMG I love it. Yeah I got nothing else. Life has been busy and nothing hilarious has happen for a while.

“Ain’t no party like a Scranton party …”

CW

You’re killing me Mr. Week!!!

Last night I did all my usual stuff before bed.

* Brushed my teeth.
* Washed my face.
* Set my alarm.

I went to bed happy for tomorrow would be Friday. I slept like that of the dead, waking up refreshed. I swore birds brought me my robe. Hello dear day. How I have longed for this week to be over.

At work I did my normal things.

*Checked my email.
*Edited copy.
*Worked on a media contract.
*Bugged the designer about ad deadlines.

Only to discover that it was Thursday. THURSDAY. Damn you Thursday, you are always letting me down.

CW

The Core and I’m Not Talking the Exercise Program

Last night I had my cards read and the core card troubled me. It displayed that to my very being I believe something that hinders me in my life, that in combination with my troubling pattern of over extending myself made for a scarily accurate assessment of me. I burnt my issue, invited in a new possibility and went home. Than in the middle of the night I woke up in the midst of a humongous panic attack.

I guess burning it isn’t going to fully make it go away. Awesome.

CW

The world is full of idiots and they seem to be running things

Just read on CNN that an insane killer is on the loose in my state after going on a field trip to the fair. I’m sorry, but who lets an “insane” killer out for a field trip. Oh that would be that state of Washington.

http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/09/19/washington.escaped.killer/index.html

Nice.

CW

La Push Baybe…

Stephanie Meyers, you have created a monster and that monster is making Forks a LOT of money. In fact three friends recently traveled there this weekend to celebrate Bella’s Birthday. They got the last hotel room at the La Push lodge. The room was massive and fit them comfortably. They could hear the ocean from the sliding door and the information on how to survive a Tsunami was much appreached by one of them with an S name.

The trio set out Friday after work and made it to their hotel by 11pm. The office was closed, but they found their keys taped to their hotel door… Yep, security was top notch but after looking through the room they found it Zombie free and settled in for the night only to get 5 hours sleep before they had to make their way to the Breaking Dawn tour site at 7:45am. Thank goodiness they hit up Jacobs Java prior to the 2.5 hour tour of all places Twilight inspired because the one whose name starts with a C was very tired after a long week at work.

BREAKING NEWS ~~~ Christy bought a hoodie ~~~

On the tour they stopped at the Cullen’s house, the Swain’s House, Charlie’s work place, and the hospital to see Dr. Cullen’s parking spot. They went to the grand opening of the Dazzled by Twilight store and C had to get the hell outta dodge because the place was so crowded she almost had a panic attack.

They saw the Mitch Handson Band play their Twilight inspired songs at the grand opening of the Twilight Lounge (yes there is a place called that in town). They could not believe that a band from Georgia filled with four straight grown men opened the set by playing their “Twilight” inspired songs for all the enclosed knuckle-heads. GROWN MEN… Straight, grown men.

To be brief … It was not what they were expecting. They thought they’d see teens losing their minds this weekend, but instead they were greeted by people their age and older all in head-to-toe Twilight gear.

So now the one with the C name has some Twilight sweat pants, One of the S’s has a sparkle sweat shirt and the other S… shit I can’t remember what she bought.

CW

What a day...

kittens
Originally uploaded by Paul's Sister

I'm the one kicking ass...

CW

Forks or BUST

Dear reader(s)

Don’t be sad that you can not accompany me on my adventures with Shannon and Shelley to a sleepy little town in Western Washington where in a matter of minutes fans from across the globe will converge to celebrate Bella’s birthday. We will be touring. We will be buying. We will be eating birthday cake.

Please God don’t let me lose my shit, start laughing and get beat up by a 14-year-old Edward fanatic and her mom (who prefers Jacob!).

CW

1, 2, 3 ... Not it.

1. Lady who works at the DMV pulling up in her shiny yellow truck with teal flames on the hood, bringing her weenie dog into work with her, whom she mostly pulls along on the leash ‘cause the little sonabitch won’t stop barking at the barista.

2. Chic at Rite Aide who is in an all teal outfit with a red flannel 10 sizes too big on as a coat using the pay phone. Shoes Birks. Hair hasn’t seen a comb in days.

3. The wine dude who helped us set up for the tasting tonight and then bitched and bitched and bitched about us running out of glasses and having to use plastic cups and how that is like making a great pasta and putting it on a paperplate. He was a big bag of douche.

I call NOT MY TEAM…

CW